... Exhausting.

One of the most repeated words of advice I received while pregnant was "sleep now, because later you won't be able to." Now looking back I see just how true those words ring. Sleep deprivation is no joke. There is a reason why it is used for phycological and physical torture. Although I recognize there is no malicious intent behind BabyK's knack for disturbing my sleep (and her own), it is hard not to long for the glorious Saturday mornings were I could sleep in once again.

Now do not be dismayed new mommas or mommas to be. Like any mom will tell you, things do get better, then worse, then better once again. It seems as though we are constantly going through the seasons of a sleep roller-coaster. Whether she's growing, teething, or getting the sniffles, it doesn't seem to matter how her sleep is disrupted, when it does, it feels like an inevitable wave crashing on the shores of my sanity.

I realize that as BabyK grows, the days will get busier, and I may find myself longing for another cup of tea more often. Who knows, maybe I will start stomaching the taste of coffee? But there is something that really helped me in the beginning and I still cling on now. An author/videoblogger Marianne Fernandez once said in a Mums Chat video that she used to pray for God to use what ever little amount of sleep she and her baby got, and how ever little it may be, it would be enough.

At the time, it really gave me hope to keep pressing on. I had believed God multiplied the few fish and loaves bread for the crowd of thousands to eat, how hard would it then to believe Him to do a miraculous work with our miniscule sleep durations? Sure enough, He does. We have always had enough, and I believe we will continue to have enough. Even if it means rough nights here, there or on repeat.

These days there seems to be a grey cloud constantly hovering over us as we wait for some sort of reprieve and resume our "normal" lives. But as I've heard so many say; this is our life. Here and now. Pandemic or not. I don't want to just survive these times, I want to rise above them. We were made to be more than conquerors after all.

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Romans 8:37

"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us."